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Location: Melbourne, Victoria, Australia

Married to Christine (22 years) and proud father of three children, Alyce,Emily & Nathan. Not as active as I'd like to be, back surgery last year has resulted in my physical life style to be somewhat compromised. I Love having a drink or two with my mates, especially in the Summer months when we take it in turns to hover over the BBQ.


Monday, September 11, 2006

Karate - Little Grasshopper

You mess with my family, you mess with me.

Here's the youngest of my clan Nathan. He has just been promoted to 8th KYU (Yellow Belt).

The next grading is Orange tip.

One of my favorite jokes...... The names have been changed to incriminate the

The moral of the story is ????

A teacher gave her class of 11 year olds an assignment:
Get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.

The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories.

Karl said, "My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg laying chooks.One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of the car
when we hit a big bump in the road and all the eggs went flying and broke and made a mess."

"What's the moral of the story?" asked the teacher."Don't put all your eggs in one basket!" Replied Karl"Very good," said the teacher.

Next little Emilie raised her hand and said, "Our family are farmers too.But we raise chooks for the meat market. One day we had a dozen eggs, but when they hatched we only got ten live chicks, and the moral to this story is,

"Don't count your chickens before they're hatched'." "That was a fine story Emilie. Ian, do you have a story to share?"

"Yes. My dad told me this story about my 3 Aunties. Cazz, Chekez and Skippy.
They were flight engineers on a plane in the Gulf War and their plane got hit. All three had to bail out over enemy territory and all they had was 3 large bottles of rum, a machine gun and a machete each. My Aunties drank all the rum on the way down so it wouldn't break, then they landed right in the middle of 150 enemy troops. They killed 120 of them with the machine guns until they ran out of bullets. Then killed twenty five more with their machete's , then killed the last five with their bare hands."

"Good heavens," said the horrified teacher, "What kind of moral did your father tell you from that horrible story?"

"Stay the hell away from Aunty Carol, Donna and Joanne when they've been on the piss."


Blogger Cazz said...

WOW... Nathan a Yellow belt, I better get a bigger "spoon" he'll snap my old one in two for sure !!!

Moral of the story ...
LMFAO...had a good chuckle over that bro.. so sad but true!!!

Ohh.. and just incase I forget, wish Emily a "Happy 16th", and the moneys in the bank !!!

Love to all

1:31 am  
Anonymous Peter said...

Now why do those names sound familiar.... ????

2:09 am  
Blogger Jeanette said...

Hi Gary
Great photo and congrats to Nathan
on getting his yellow belt .
Started to laugh before i got to the end lol i think i have to agree with the end
Take care love Mumxxxx

12:16 am  
Anonymous Merle said...

Good jokes Gary, BUT are your sisters still talking to you? Cheers, Merle.

6:54 pm  
Blogger LittleJen said...

good one gary, you tell me I spend to much time on the computer, our blogs tell another story.

"The Preasure"


2:53 pm  
Blogger The Heir said...

HAHA!! thats awesome!! love the trippy foto of ur daughters head on the table too, am curious as to what questions were on the boyfriend interview??
not sure if i should know who you are somehow but my grampa (peter) and my aunty merle seem to and i think i saw a comment from you on my dads blog too...
im zac btw ;)

12:04 am  

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